Apple Juice & Rainbows

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
theorigamiphoenix
ms-demeanor

Due to some stuff brought up in recent posts I believe it is time to once again extol the virtues of Ms-Demeanor's Patented Where Did I Put That Fucking Paper Organizational Binder.

Hello! I am a disorganized adult! This is the system by which I manage my important shit like pink slips for my car and medical records and tax information.

You're going to need:

  • A 3-Ring Binder
  • Transparent Sheet Protectors
  • Notebook dividers (optional but VERY useful)
  • A backpack (optional)

So the way this system works is you put the sheet protectors into the binder. You can either use the dividers to divide the binder into sections or you can label some of the sheet protectors to make different sections but what you are generally going to do is make sections of the binder labeled things like "taxes" or "vet" or "doctor" and put a few sheet protectors in each section.

Then all of your papers with important information get crammed in that folder. You don't organize them, you don't sort them by date, you don't alphabetize. You put things vaguely relating to taxes into the sheet protectors in the taxes section. You put things relating to cars in the cars section. You don't even attempt to make this readable - you're not using sheet protectors so that you can read each page and keep it legible, you're using sheet protectors because it's a cheap plastic bag that will sit nicely in a binder.

You CAN put stuff into the individual sheet protectors when you get it, but let's be realistic you probably WON'T do that, so just tuck individual papers into the front of the binder until you get to a critical mass of paperwork then take an hour to sit down and sort into categories and put it in the binder once every six months to three years (depending on how frequently you get paperwork). Sometimes these sections will outgrow their original allotted space - since my spouse had a transplant surgery the medical section has had to become its own folder - and that's okay. If you end up with multiple folders just keep them together (this is why the backpack is an option, and one I strongly recommend).

Because yeah, if my organization system relies on opening up a drawer and putting something where it belongs as soon as I get the paper, I will simply not be organized. It's not going to happen. But I can handle a messy stack of paper that sits in one place and grows until it is time to shove it into a binder. I can't organize things for thirty seconds a day every day but I can organize things for an hour once every year or so (maybe two hours every five years when I sort out stuff I don't need like copies of warranties for parts on a car I don't own anymore).

When my mom died she had about fifty pounds of paper files in her office that were neatly organized in a system that didn't make any sense to my dad, my sister, and I. I ended up sorting through those files for twenty hours, tossing out copies of paid invoices from ten years ago and student handbooks from my junior high school. I reduced one filing cabinet, two desk file drawers, and a foot-high stack to a six inch binder that I gave to my dad. My mom died five years ago; two months ago my dad asked me about a medical document and I was able to tell him to go look for it in the medical section of the binder. It was there, because ALL IMPORTANT SHIT GOES IN THE BINDER.

Where is my birth certificate? In the binder. Where is my tax return from 2017? In the binder. Where is the record of my dog's last rabies shot? In the binder. Where are the records for my life insurance? In the binder.

A lot of what people consider "being organized" breaks down to whether or not you can find the specific things that you're looking for. Does my binder look nice? Is it aesthetic? Does it have color-coded tabs and papers all laid out neatly? Absolutely fucking not. But if you ask me where to find a paper I know that I can do so within about five minutes of shuffling through the pile of letter-folded sheets that I pulled out of the appropriate section of the binder.

I've discussed the Where Did I Put that Fucking Paper Binder before, but now it is time to expand that concept to the Backpack of Important Shit.

You likely have Important Shit that does not fit in a binder. Some of my Important Shit that does not fit in a binder is stuff like jewelry and the spare key for my car. Other stuff - the reason I decided to bring this up at all - includes my backup hard drive and packaging (including product key codes) for pretty much all of the software that I own. This is also where I store printed out copies of the recovery codes for most of the online accounts that I have.

There's a lot of weird fiddly shit that we have to have that we might not access all that often. This is the kind of stuff that might end up in junk drawers or under sinks or in disused laptop bags or kicking around under a bunch of papers in a desk drawer.

It doesn't matter so much when that weird fiddly shit is a set of hex keys or a utility knife or a protractor or a copy of a student handbook but it DOES matter when it's something that you might need to put your hands on in a hurry. If your computer crashes, you're not going to want to track down the software in the back of a filing cabinet and the backup drive from somewhere in the bowels of your desk. If you lock your keys in your car you are not going to want to figure out if your spare is in a junk drawer or the old purse where you keep semi-important stuff or the tin on your desk that has buttons and pins and headphone covers. Just put it in the Backpack of Important Shit and when you need it you know where to look.

So anyway, if you are a person who is a minor disaster who has trouble finding important things when you need them please don't think that you have to get your life together and have a nice organized filing cabinet or clear plastic bins full of documents or a neatly divided storage closet where everything from board games to backup drives has its own neatly labeled place. Just assign ONE LOCATION for important shit and start putting the important shit there. It doesn't matter if you have a filing cabinet where you keep old copies of homework and printouts of online orders and family history records - you do not need to keep everything that is file-able in one place and depending on what level of catastrophe you are it might be detrimental to you if you try to do that. It doesn't matter if you have a jewelry box where you keep your collection of gauges and wrist cuffs; if you are going to stress out about where grandma's ring is when you're digging through your collection of cheap earrings and silver pendants then *do not keep grandma's ring or any other Important, Vital, Cannot Be Lost jewelry in with your day-to-day wear*.

I live someplace that has fires. My binder got upgraded to my Backpack of Important Shit when the fires were getting uncomfortably close to the house I was living in and I wanted to have one bag to grab if we had to get out fast. Once I did that, I never took the binder out of the backpack and the backpack has now made three moves with me and has meant that I've had my birth certificate handy when I needed it in the middle of a move between two states, I was able to provide a history of my cholesterol panel going back six years to a visiting nurse, and I was able to give the exact names and contact info of my spouse's previous surgeon to the hospital when I had unexpectedly moved to a new state with three bags and my work computer at the beginning of the pandemic.

Get yourself a backpack of important shit and a folder of where the fuck did i put that paper. It is so much easier to search a backpack for important shit than to go through an entire house and it is so much easier to flip through a binder than it is to dig through a filing cabinet.

Anyway good luck and happy adulting.

ms-demeanor

Criteria for determining what is important shit:

  1. Was the document difficult to get? Birth certificates, death certificates, deeds, pink slips for cars, etc. Falls into this category. If you had to spend more than an hour getting the document and if you would have to make at least one phone call to replace it, it is an important document.
  2. Was the paper difficult to generate? If you had to sit down and fuck around with a program and look at three other sheets of paper to make the document, keep a copy of the document you generated. This might be a tax return, this might be a college financial aid application, this might be an application for a home loan.
  3. Does it have an account number on it? You do not need to keep EVERY piece of paper with an account number on it, but it is a good idea to keep at least one piece of paper with an account number for accounts that send you paper. You should have one copy of a bank statement or a credit card statement or a life insurance policy number or your retirement savings number. A good way to determine what you should have is by asking "how many steps would I need to take to get this number if I was talking to someone on the phone about it." Maybe I don't need to keep a bank statement because it would be very easy for me to get a copy of my account number, but it would be difficult for me to track down my life insurance policy number online so a copy goes in the folder.
  4. Does the paper represent a legally binding agreement? This means is it a lease agreement, an insurance policy, a financing agreement? The whole document goes in the folder because you want a place where you can reference the agreement in case you need to file a claim or something like that.
  5. Is the paper current? It is good for me to have a record of my dog's rabies vaccines, but I do not need to keep a copy of every vaccine she has ever had in her life; I can discard old copies. It is good for me to have a copy of the insurance for my current car. I do not need a copy of the insurance for a car I no longer own.
  6. What would happen if someone asked for this document and I didn't have it? If a mechanic asked you for a copy of a receipt for a repair done at a different shop five years ago and you didn't have it, you would likely not have any problems. If you were asked to produce a copy of your birth certificate in order to get a marriage license and you didn't have the document, there would be problems.

Keeping paperwork is not a matter of sparking joy, it is a matter of covering ass. If you had to move to a new state on the other side of the country and establish yourself there for everything from getting an ID to requesting a pet license to applying for a loan or opening a bank account to proving your income history to a landlord, would you have the documents you needed to get it done? If you have those documents, they go in the folder.

sybeez
bogleech

this 50′s hungarian comic strip I’d never heard of until now is so damn cute for something that also gets so horny

coolclaytony

It helps that the writer was trying to create something he hoped would appeal to women as much as men.

bogleech

Yeah and I think where it really succeeds vs. modern anime wifey fantasy shit is that Jucika really is just a character super comfortable with being sexual, likes looking sexy and even has no shame in using it to get her way:

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….But at the same time, she doesn’t tolerate being objectified against her wishes:

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….And the comic takes her side in both cases, whereas I’ve seen countless modern narratives in which this same character would have only been framed as like a Slutty ™ Bitch ™ or full blown villain.

kaible

One of the things I also really like about this comic, besides what’s already been stated, is that the humor isn’t always about her being sexy. Sometimes it’s just about other goofy things in her life!

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bogleech

oh yes many of them are experienes just anybody can relate to

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but then there’s also the time she just….built a functional AI?

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she just didn’t predict how the robot rebellion would really manifest

rosebloodcat

I love how there isn’t a single dialogue bubble, yet you can fully understand what’s happening.

Always reblog Jucika.

I found this camera on the subway and look what was inside…

reffitt-blog1:

snazzy-hats-and-adhd:

hebbic:

the-haiku-bot:

happy-quack:

calvin-reads-problem-sleuth:

clownboykilljoy:

andy-the-anon:

foolishly-snowy:

cookieknights18:

your-local-emo-goblin:

haiku-robot:

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evil-haiku-robot:

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sighinastorm:

portmanteau-bot:

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violetfin-hskin:

furioussharkkitten:

riv-the-awkward-one:

t0rdsk1:

lizzy7064:

preciousgaby:

freddyxbonnieshipper459:

batballon:

softmushie:

n-oy-a:

na7hannck:

vintagecartoonz:

iqniited:

princey-must-slay:

ryanterryxd:

agentflash18:

chemucalcrying:

try-the-wine:

folie-a-ducks:

lualmu:

the-angels-take-asgard:

avis-meum:

thatsnotwatyourmomsaid:

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I would marry this man

guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes

When I liked it, it flashed “0 notes”

It’s showing -1 notes

i’m gonna keep reblogging this and you can’t stop me

I liked it and it said ‘1 note’

tf is this crap?

1 NOTE I’VE ONLY COME ACROSS 3 OF THESE POSTS IN MY LIFE

ITS STILL SAID 1 NOTE WTF????? 

legendary

What the fuck

YES BUT DID HE GET HIS CAMERA BACK?? WE NEED TO KNOW!

WE WILL NEVER KNOW… =((((

IT still says 0 notes?? WTF!!

This is the first thing I saw on my dash

I’m shook

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKERY

WTF-

SAME HERE!!! I JUST GAVE IT A LIKE AND IT DIDN’T STAY

1 note WTF.

@foolishly-snowy

3rd time and it’s still broken. This lovely cursèd post.

THERE IS ANOTHER ONE?????

still not-works

still + notworks =
stotworks.

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Portmanteau Bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop.

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U̯P̕O̸̐͜N̑̇͞ ̴̯̃ͧḀͩΙ͋͞ ̸͇̀ͥ͘N͟U̪̤̭̎͜L̃ͭ͟͠L̪̦͡-͈̘̖́̐Ṋ̢̲̣Oͮ̿̕T̷E̸̖̳̯̍S̼ ̷̬͍͘͜PΊ̧͌͡OͬͩṢT͚͐̋͟͡ ͦA̶̺͙͛͠N͈̑ͬ́̕Ď̵̯ ̰͖́

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A day will come when i won’t reblog this…

But it is not today

What the fuck is even happening with this post??? Also it’s got 1 note again.

I got a notif saying I was mentioned in this post but I clearly wasn’t

HeY tumblr what the FUCK

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Did the man get his camera

I have seen posts that broke the notes. But this is the first time I’ve seen a post that broke the bots. 

I know this is long but holy hell I love it when bots run amok

I know this is long

but holy hell I love it

when bots run amok

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

I think I saw somewhere that the man got his camera back. Also what the fuck tumblr.

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What Tumblr eldritch horror did I find

hiveswap

I just saw the most Galaxy Brain gender take ever, from a cis man on reddit

quousque

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[ID: a screenshot of a comment from reddit, with no username visible. The commend reads: This doesn’t make a ton of sense to me either. Setting aside the question of whether gender/sex is assigned or observed at birth, the gender I was assigned at birth was ‘boy.’ The gender I have now is ‘man’. Boys and men have different gender roles, and few adults identify as boys anymore. From this standpoint, every adult has a different gender than the one they had at birth. End ID]

Framing “girl” and “boy” as separate genders from “woman” and “man” is such an amazing take. it’s a framework that accommodates and explains so many trans experiences. Some trans people never were their AGAB. Some feel like they were their AGAB, but that that changed (usually when puberty hits, which is when you start “becoming a man/woman”. The accepted societal path is that girls grow up to into women, and boys grow up into men. But some girls grow up into men, and some boys grow up into women. This guy was a boy who grew up into a man, which generally works out pretty well for people. Some boys and girls grow up into people who aren’t men or women, even! It’s like this random cis guy skipped right over transgender 101, 102, 201, etc. and stumbled directly into Transgender Nirvana.

theorigamiphoenix
pasteboard

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hey netizens! i'm not sure how many people are aware, but youtube's been slowly rolling out a new anti-adblock policy that can't be bypassed with the usual software like uBlock Origin and Pi-Hole out of the gate

BUT, if you're a uBlock Origin user (or use an adblocker with a similar cosmetics modifier), you can add these commands in the uBlock dashboard to get rid of it!

youtube.com##+js(set, yt.config_.openPopupConfig.supportedPopups.adBlockMessageViewModel, false)

youtube.com##+js(set, Object.prototype.adBlocksFound, 0)

youtube.com##+js(set, ytplayer.config.args.raw_player_response.adPlacements, [])

youtube.com##+js(set, Object.prototype.hasAllowedInstreamAd, true)

reblog to help keep the internet less annoying and to tell corporations that try shit like this to go fuck themselves <3

pigcatapult

Where do I copy-paste these to? "My filters"? "My Rules"?

gaphic

'my filters'! if you look closely you'll notice the format is different between the two pages. the (website)(##)(additional text) format goes in filters

rainbowthefox
aroacemonster

Friendly reminder that LGBTQ+, Queer, and LGBT+ are the preferred terms for the community (x).

Friendly reminder that Queer is approved by 72.9% of the people, and the groups who don’t prefer it’s use as an umbrella term are straight people, exclusionists, transmeds, truscums, sex-negative people, and sex work critical people (x).

Friendly reminder that aros and aces are excluded only 9.2% / 8.1% of the time respectively while being included  78.9% / 81.2% of the time (x)

Friendly reminder that exclusionists are in the minority and aro/ace people are included in the LGBTQ+ community by the people within the community.

pinkqueerpunk

Also, i checked out the survey the second claim sources a while back: this is not OP choosing the words truscum, exclusionist, etc. These are labels that the survey gave people the option to self-identify as. It’s self-proclaimed exclusionists who dont like the word queer, not random accusations

prochoice-is-pro-compassion

yeah that’s super important. 

faranae

This one gets reblogged on main. The reclassification of ‘queer’ as an inexcusable slur is a recent development which stems in part from exclusionist rhetoric. We reclaimed it decades ago. Learn our history. You are not immune to TERF propaganda, but you can absolutely choose to educate yourself to spite it.

Be kind. 💜